Nadine West August 2015

Nadine West is a clothing subscription service. Nadine West is completely free, unless you keep an item. You only pay for what you keep. There is no subscription fee or anything else. Each month you are sent 1 top, and 2 pieces of jewelry. The prices for each item varies, but I have yet to see something more than $25, which makes it pretty affordable for the most part. 

It comes in pretty pink package, just like Ipsy does. 

Inside your outfit is wrapped in pretty pink tissue paper. 

This month I received a pair of purple, green, and silver earrings. They were very cute, but not something I can ever see myself wearing. They kind of reminded me of an easter egg. I sent them back. 

This turquoise necklace was gorgeous, but again, not something I can see myself wearing. So I didnt keep it either. 

This pink top was very cute. Extremely thin but cute. 

I especially loved the back detail. It was way too small in the arms though. I felt like my arms were going to fall off it was so tight. I was extremely sad to have to send it back because it was so nice. 

My second shirt was also very cute. I do feel that a tank top in August was a little strange. I've been packing up all of my summer stuff since were getting into fall, and so I couldnt see spending any money on a tank top.

It did have really cute back detail as well, but it was a tad bit too short for me. 

This month I didnt keep anything. There just wasnt anything that fit right, or was my style. I'm hoping that next month I'll get something that I can actually keep. This was the first month that I had ever received two shirts, and I kind of liked it. It was nice having a second chance to find something that I was really going to like. 

I enjoy getting my Nadine West package every month, though I do wish that I would actually get some items that I like. It feels like I give feedback every month, and yet I still dont receive anything that really fits my style. I am hoping that once winter comes I start getting things that I like. I'm a sucker for a cute sweater. 

I definitely think that Nadine West is worth at least trying, considering that its free if you dont like anything. And you at least have a chance to try something that you normally wouldnt pick out for yourself. I'll continue receiving mine for a couple more months at least. 

Until Next Time,

Sara

Starting My Weight Loss Journey. The Beginning.

Awhile back (before getting pregnant with my first child who is now 4) I got the brilliant idea that I needed to start a fitness program. I needed to exercise and I needed to eat healthy. I was meal prepping and I had planned menus. I was working out and I was feeling great. And then I got pregnant. Which means I stopped working out and eating healthy. (which is not a great idea. I should have stuck with it but I didn't) I weighed 115lbs when I got pregnant. I was 160lbs when I gave birth. Ya, 45lbs gain.

19 weeks pregnant with my 1st, proof that I was looking good (even though I felt huge and thought I was fat back then)

Fast forward 3 years, I got pregnant with my second. I had done nothing to lose my baby weight from my first pregnancy. I weighed 160lbs. I was huge. I ate better but still wasn't that active. With all the complications from my first, and then miscarriage, I was so afraid of pushing myself and losing my little one. So I did nothing. Probably not my best decision but ones made out of fear usually aren't. 

19 Weeks with my 2nd. I was considerably larger (which I know happens with second babies). I felt awful. I was 160lbs when I got pregnant and 175lbs when I gave birth. I left the hospital weighing 160lbs.

I felt good that the baby weight had disappeared when I gave birth but that didn't last long. I was breastfeeding, and starving all the time. So I ate. A lot. I was told that my milk supply would drop if I didn't eat enough, so I ate all the time. Anytime I even thought I was hungry I ate. And we started eating out a lot as it was just easier with a newborn and a 3 year old. 

Fast forward again to present day. I currently fluctuate between 175 and 180. I'm not comfortable in most of my clothes. My youngest is 1 now, and I still wear my maternity clothes on a semi regular basis. I don't own a whole lot that fits me, and I don't want to buy more. I don't like what I see in the mirror. So I decided to do something about it. 

My mom bought me the 21 day fix for my birthday, and I'm doing it. I'm on day 4 of the diet, and day 3 of the workout (I skipped a day due to nasal congestion that made me unable to breathe through my nose at all and general sickness). My husband is doing it with me. I'm determined to not only lose weight, but to start living a healthier lifestyle. We as a family have fallen into some pretty bad habits (too much junk food and eating out). I want more for myself and for my family. So this time I've made a plan, I've found support, and I'm making it happen. I'm fresh out of excuses. 

Its doable, and I know that. I just need to do it. Eventually I don't want to be on a 'diet'. I just want to know how to eat right. Eventually I want to be able to trust myself to make the right choices when it comes to food, but for now I need the structure of a diet plan. This is a starting point. I know that healthy living is a lifelong commitment, and I'm ready to make it. 

I realize that there are going to be days where we eat out, or we have candy and junk food. Someday I will be able to have those things and enjoy them in moderation. But right now I can't have any, because I don't know what moderation is. I over indulge in most things. 

This journey isn't just about losing weight. Its about learning to trust and love myself again. Right now I don't like what I see in the mirror, and I don't trust myself to make healthy choices. But someday I will. And I took that first step. Now its just one day at a time.

A little behind

So I have tried out two different pinterest recipes since my last post, and both of them turned out pretty good for the most part. I of course didn't think to take pictures, but I'm going to try them both again with a couple modifications, and I'll take pictures then. I'm going to wait till I do that to post what I tried, and how it turned out. It should be sometime soon though, since I'm using one of the recipes for my husband's homecoming, which is coming up here in the near future.

Speaking of homecoming, I'm starting to get things together for it. I am so excited. This has been a short deployment, but it is also the first one that we have gone through together. I'm trying to get everything ready so that its done. I still have a while to figure it all out, but I hate waiting till the last second. I really just want everything ready so that I can relax. Well, relax as much as possible considering I have 2 kids and I'm overly excited.

I need to start working out again. I was doing really well with it, but then I started to slack, and I just gave up. I tend to do that. I wish that I could find a work out that I enjoy doing, instead of it being a chore. I think if I enjoyed it, it would be easier to stick to it. I'm not saying that there wouldn't be days that I would hate it, but at least for the most part I would like it. I'm just not sure what type of work out I would enjoy. Maybe I just need to keep trying different things until I find what I like. That's probably the best way to do it. At some point I'll post my before pictures as well as my measurements, but I have to upload them, and I'm just to lazy for that right now. I seem to be too lazy to do much of anything right now.

I think having my mom, grandma, and sister come visit just took a lot out of me. I really enjoyed their visit, but now that they've gone home I seem to be exhausted. We did a TON of sight seeing, and were busy pretty much the entire time that they were here. Now that they've gone back to Colorado I just feel drained. I'm not use to shoving that much stuff into such a short period of time. They were here for 10 days and we went raspberry picking, hiking at Fort Casey, drove over Deception Pass, broke in my fire pit, watched fireworks, saw a parade, walked around the park, explored Port Townsend, and went to Coupeville. We also tried out a few different restuarants. We did all of that plus 3 doctors appointments, and Lillian had her first dance class. It was just a lot of go go go, and usually We only do a few things a week. This week has a ton of running around as well, but its more normal, low key things. It'll be nice to be getting back to normal. I do miss my family though. It was really nice to have them around for a bit. I didnt realize how much I miss living close to them until they came out here.

Speaking of doctors appointments, mine didnt go the way that I had hoped it would. Well, thats not totally true. I did get answers which is what I had hoped for. They just weren't the answers that I had wanted. I wanted to know what had caused my PE. And I had wanted it to be something simple that could be easily cured, and then I would be able to move on with my life. It is something simple, lupus anticoagulant, but there isn't a cure. Its something that I will have for the rest of my life, and have to take medication for. If I do my regular blood tests, take my meds, and pay attention to my body than I will be fine. It does mean changing some of the plans that I had for my life. Having more children is most likely out of the question. The risks would be high, and I'm not willing to pay the price if something goes wrong. I'm not willing to risk not seeing the two children I have grow up. I'm not willing to risk leaving them without a mother. I'm also not willing to risk losing a child. That's something that I know I couldn't handle. My heart feels broken over this. I wanted at least 3 children. I know that I am blessed to have the 2 that I do, I know that this is obviously what God has planned for me. I know that in the long run this is the right decision, but that doesn't mean that I am ready to except that, not yet at least. I need time to grieve over the rest of the children that I will never have. I need to grieve over the things that I wanted to do that I will no longer be able to. I will never feel a child kick me from inside, I will never grow another precious gift. I will never be pregnant again. I will never get to watch my body change as a beautiful baby grows inside me. And I am devastated. I wanted all of that. No matter how sick I was, or how miserable I got towards the end of my pregnancies, I loved it. I loved knowing that I was going to have another child. I loved seeing them on the ultrasound, and hearing their heartbeats, I loved feeling them kick, or get the hiccups. I will miss all of that. I regret that I didn't enjoy those things more while I was pregnant with Landon and Lillian. I thought I would get to do it again. I should have enjoyed it all more. But I enjoyed it as much as I could. I'm just trying to come to terms with all of this. I know that I could have another, but the risks are too high. Both my pregnancies were high risk, and all the things that happened can be linked to my having the lupus anticoagulant. It all makes sense now. The placental abruption, the preterm labor, the miscarriage, the umbilical cord with Landon, the blood clots. All of these are risks associated with this. And it would be selfish to have more children when I know the risks. Someday I will make peace with this, but I'm not to that place yet. I still need time. God has a plan, and I need to trust in that.

Well now that I've made myself cry I'm going to go snuggle my two little ones. I'm going to go enjoy them as much as I can. I am happy in my life. I am blessed beyond what I could ever have hoped for. I have all that I need and much of what I want. I am content. I just need to remember that when things get difficult. My husband will be home soon, and then we can work through this together. God is watching over us. I know that in time it'll all be okay. I just need to have a little extra faith.

Finally!

Lillian is now almost completely potty trained. Literally one day she was refusing to go in the potty, and then the next she did, all on her own. We did give her rewards for when she went in the potty. I printed off a sticker chart that I found online (here) and she got one sticker for pee and two for poop. After about two weeks we stopped giving her stickers, and so far she keeps going in the potty. She just goes on her own now. We still need to get her potty trained at night and when we leave the house. So far she just wears pull ups when we arent at home and at bedtime. I'm thinking were going to try to take her grocery shopping in regular undies this weekend and see how it goes.


Lillian is talking more and more every day. She seems to love to talk all the time. Its amazing all the new things that she has learned to say. She's getting very good at expressing herself and what she wants and thinks. She loves to color, and giggle. All the time. She's learned to cross her eyes and thinks that its the funniest thing in the world. Its cute how hilarious she is.


I'm also trying to get things ready for when we leave for Idaho. We're going to be gone almost the entire month of June visiting the husband's family. I'm excited, and it'll be nice to relax for a bit. I think I need a vacation. There is just so much to go before we leave, and I know that I still have a month to get ready but that doesnt feel like enough time right now. I'm making lists of all the things that need to be done before we go, so hopefully that will make it easier. I'm also making lists for what all needs to be packed so that we dont forget anything, or over pack like I did last year. I think that I brought almost everything that we owned last time. It was pretty ridiculous. I'm going to try really hard not to do that this year. I'm also not going to worry so much about packing Lillian's stuff based on exact outfits with matching hair bows and all of that. I think I'm just going to make sure she has enough to wear, and if she runs out I can do laundry while were at his mom's. Okay, to be honest I'm going to over pack. I always do. I would rather have too much then not enough.


I also need to get the two chapters of Sleeping Beauty that will post in June written before we leave. I dont want to have to worry about them while on vacation. That means I need to get May's written first. I'm hoping that by the 15th I'll have the four chapters done and scheduled. We will see how that goes. The latest chapter of Sleeping Beauty is up Chapter 4. There are also a lot of new posts by all the other authors up. They are all pretty great as well.


I have a few crafts and things that I'm trying to get done at the moment as well. I'll post them as I get to doing them. I'm thinking more glitter jars, finishing the afghan, and maybe some other things. I figure the busier I keep myself the less I'll stress about leaving for vacation. We'll see how that goes.

Everything is getting done!

So this week has seemed so busy for some reason. I still cant figure out why, since there really wasnt that much to do. I guess its probably because Easter is on Sunday, and it takes forever to get ready for anything. I have made progress on some of my goals, which is exciting! I am actually really proud of all the things that have actually gotten done, or at least started over this past week.

There is a new chapter of Sleeping Beauty that went up at 8 am this morning. You can check it out here http://wickedlytwistedtales.blogspot.com/2013/03/sleeping-beauty_28.html . Please leave me some feedback if you do check it out. I would love to know what people are thinking as they read it. I've been trying to promote the blog as much as possible so that we can get more readers. The other author's works are pretty great as well, so check them out after you read mine. Twitter seems to be the easiest for promoting everything. My twitter is @SaraEcho for anyone who might care to follow me. (I really could use more followers, it would make promoting everything easier.)

I have also been working hard on Lillian's afghan. I am really proud of how far I have gotten so quickly. I am already one skein of yarn in, and started on the second. I think that its going to be beautiful when I finally finish it. I did make it larger than I had planned on, but thats okay. Its going to work great as a blanket on her queen sized bed this summer. I really enjoy crocheting. I cant wait to take more classes and get better at it. It seems to be really calming, which is awesome. Here's the blanket so far.

We have also been working hard on potty training. Lillian doesnt seem to really want to, which makes it hard. She doesnt care if there's poop or pee in her diaper or underwear. It doenst seeem to bother her at all. She does like to sit on the potty, which is a start. She also knows how to tell me when she goes potty. If we could only get her to tell us before she goes I think she would be potty trained in a second. She loves to put her monkey on the potty. The other day he even took a nap there. Which is really cute, and kind of gross at the same time. The monkey finally got washed, and it looks almost brand new. Luckily Lillian didnt mind me cleaning him. Here's where she tucked monkey in for his nap the other day. It was really sweet of her. She takes such great care of her monkey.

Lillian also got to see her grandpa, which was awesome. He had a layover in Denver on his way back home to Idaho, and so we went to see him at the airport. It was nice for him to get to spend a couple of hours with her. I really do wish that Brandon's family lived closer so that we could see them more often. I do talk to MaK every so often, and his mom video calls Lillian almost everyday. I'm grateful for the technology that we have today, because without they would miss out on seeing her growup, which doesnt seem fair. We are going to Idaho for around 20 days or so in June, which will be fun. I'm really excited to go this time, instead of nervous like I was last year. Of course this time I know everyone, know that we all get along and love each other, and Brandon and I are married. Its going to be a great vacation. 

We are still working on the getting pregnant thing, but so far no luck. I am afraid that its not going to happen, and I know thats silly. I mean we were pregnant in November, we can do it again. I'm just afraid that we'll have another miscarriage, and I dont know how I would handle that. It was so hard to lose that baby, and to know that we wont ever get to know that child. I know that God will send us our second when the time is right, I just wish it would happen sooner rather than later. Sooner as in this month. I really need to work on being patient. 

Now all I need to do is get my house clean, start on my novel, and figure out how to find more story competitions to submit my shorts to. I am so excited for the way everything has been going, and I am excited for everything to continue. Its a beautiful life, and I know that I only have God to thank for all my blessings. 

just an update.

I know I said that I was going to post regularly, but that seems to be harder to do than I had originally thought it was going to be. I get so caught up in everything else that I need to get done, and I forget about my blog completely. I am working on things though, and getting better at having time for myself. It goes get easier the more I work on it.

I am taking part in a group blog. It's pretty exciting, and something that I am very proud to be a part of. Each of the writers has chosen a fairy tale, and we are retelling them in our own way. The posts so far are fantastic, and I look forward to reading more of them. I feel honored that I was asked to be part of this, and I really hope that more people will check out our stories. So, here is the link for you to go check it out Twisted Tales. I will warn you that some of the content can be a bit graphic, and not appropriate for all ages, so just keep that in mind when reading. 

I'm also trying to get some ideas in order so that I can start working on a novel of my own. I have several started that I never bothered to finish that I may revisit, but I think I want to start something new. I've been feeling inspired lately, and I want to do this. Its something that I always put off, and I think that its about time I stop doing that. If nothing else, I can at least feel proud of myself for finally finishing a story, which really is my main goal. 

My plate might be a bit full with all the things that I keep planning to get done, but at least then when I get tired of one thing I have something else to move onto. This Friday I'm taking my second crochet class, which I am really excited about. I'm hoping to finish the blanket that I started for Lillian, and then make a second one for Brandon so that he can take it with him when he goes on deployment next. I plan on taking a granny square class next month, which should make the blanket projects easier for me. Right now I'm working only in single and double crochet, which seems to take forever, even though I'm pretty quick. 

Lillian seems to be getting bigger constantly, which is amazing to watch. She is so smart, and learning so quickly. It really makes me proud to be her mother. Right now she is all about her dad, and wants nothing to do with me when he's around. Which is okay because there will be times when he isnt around, and we did just get out of the only wanting mommy phase. Shes talking more and more everyday, and learning new things. Her favorite color right now is blue, and she knows shes two. Her favorite phrases are "Its so cuttte" "Eat my shorts" "Its so good" "its so cute" and "love you too". She can also sing the "e i e i o" part of old mcdonald. Its amazing how great she is. 

Brandon is pretty much the same as always, which means amazing. He's such a good man, and great father. He loves us more than anything, and takes great care of us. We really are blessed that he came into our lives. 

Pretty much everything would be perfect if we could only get pregnant, which hopefully we will soon. Keep your fingers crossed that this month will be the month for us!